The faithfulness of God does not make sense to me, because I am not faithful
The love of God doesn't make sense to me, because I don't know how to love
The pursuit of God does not make sense to me, because I leave Him habitually
The patience of God does not make sense to me, because I test Him often
The grace of God does not make sense to me, because I am hopeless alone
The forgiveness of God does not make sense to me, because I hurt Him frequently
I don't understand a God who would love me anyway. I don't. I'm overwhelmed by Someone who promises to be faithful to me knowing I will be unfaithful to Him. I am overwhelmed that I can say I belong to the kingdom of God because His Son stands in my place. Because His Son was faithful to His will. Because Jesus is faithful to me.
I don't understand deserving nothing and being given everything. I don't know if I ever will truly understand what it means to be a child of a God like this. But I want to spend the rest of my life trying. And if I can't, I want to spend the rest of my life being beautifully and repeatedly confused by an overwhelmingly beautiful God.
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