What I lack in ability, I make up in velocity

 God's love is the kind of love that doesn't stop when it's tired, it stops when it's done.
Joy is a verb, and it is the attitude of God's heart towards His people. His own.

"For Zion's sake I will not hold my peace;
And for Jerusalem's sake I will not rest,
Until her righteousness goes forth as brightness,
And her salvation as a lamp that burns."

"And as the bridegroom rejoices over the bride,
So shall your God rejoice over you."

I get the question "So, why do you want to be a doctor?" often.
Often. 
And in general, my usually lame answer is some kind of hybrid between a mutter and a nervous, staccato laugh: "I just want to help people, and I'm really interested in the body. Haha. Ha. Heh....uh....mmmmm".

Which, you know, makes me sound like some feeble wannabe vigilante crossed with a really big weirdo.
But I promise, that's not really why. I mean, kind've, but really, no.

The real reason is because I'm an addict.

I look back at my life (short though it may be), and all I see is a series of jumps from grace to abundant grace. I think back and remember provision; being loved. I see adversity and sin in the midst of beautiful glory, redemption, and all I really can take away is that God is good, and God is faithful, and I am always, ever, being inexorably pulled toward freedom.

The truth is, that I am a little bit addicted to becoming free, just like a bird uncaged. I'm a little addicted to beauty, and this overwhelming grace that continually envelops what I thought was failure and transforms it into light. I'm hooked on this wild joy that comes with abandonment: of self, and of preconceived plans, and of perceived boundaries; I want to spend my entire life unlearning all the ways that I can't. Cynicism is blindingly crippling; hope opens your eyes to what is really possible.

Bondage comes in many forms. Many flavors. Pits can look like whitewashed fences and glaring streetlights illuminating paved trails, or trash heaps and the scavenging forced to abandon dignity. Hell is separation of souls, and hell may begin at any time.

But so can freedom.

The honest to goodness truth, is that I want to be a doctor for the same reason a bird released from a cage soars to the clouds at top speed; for the same reason a candle shoots forth flickering rays of unrestrained light, for the same reason hands clasped with intertwined fingers can sometimes feel like home.

Because God's love towards His lost people will never stop;
 He will never hold His peace until we are righteous, spotless, and redeemed.
I care because I've known bondage, and now I know abundant life.
I care because I've known sickness, and I've been healed.
Because I know Jehova-Rapha, Jehovah Jireh, Jehovah Tsidkenu, and how grace and glory are shaking inside us, wild to be released and break forth into a testimony of El Roi-our God who sees us.

I want to view magnificent grace and bonds loosed and love revealed along with the same people that are infinitely precious to their God. I want to share the wild and free life that God is waiting to supply with rejoicing and joy to a people whom He has loved eternally.

I'm an addict--to abundant life, and abundant grace; astonishing redemption and wild freedom.