Just a few scattered thoughts I am still sorting through
What is at the root of a need for control?
Pain reminds this heart that this is not our home.
What if blessings come through pain and trouble?
What if persecution comes through comfort?
How counter cultural is a life lived to Jesus, where we are to rejoice that everything we ever had and will ever have has been given to us, and in response to that gift we are to live subject and in submission to Someone other than our own self?
How is it that we shirk suffering when the greatest thing that ever happened to humanity came through the pinnacle of physical, psychological and spiritual suffering the world has ever experienced when Jesus went to the cross and let them take His life?
How would it look if I let Jesus come into my life and redefine truth as I know it? What if I allowed Him to take the lies I've believed and the skewed truths I've held onto and refine them so that they align with the only truth that will stand through all these ages of darkness? How would my life look then?
Know how sometimes you feel as if you love someone so much your heart could burst with the feeling and emotion? I felt that way a lot as a kid; when someone gave me a chocolate bar, when someone took me to a theme park, when my parents decided to defer a spanking that I knew I deserved. It raises up a fierce allegiance in you and all you want to do is act on the feeling and give back everything you have in gratitude. I'm still like that kid. I still get that way sometimes with God. Maybe it's the simple reaction of a need love to a gift love. Maybe it's the reaction of a starving baby when a mother nurses it. I don't know. It's a humble kind of love, one that doesn't need any pomp or circumstance or heralding. It's quiet. It's almost shy. It'd be content to stay in the corner with it's joyful appreciation of the simple things. Maybe my love for God has just never been able to move past a dependent child on a fortress of hope.
Ok. Alright. Call me young and inexperienced and immature. But I can only echo the well known words of a song that I hope my heart will always proclaim.
What can I say? What can I do? But offer this heart, O God, completely to You
Isn't it fear which is at the root of a need for control? For me it is, anyway. It's fear of being dragged someplace I don't want to be, made to do things I'm not altogether comfortable with, and being kept from the things which I think I like best. And it's fear of being in a position where control can't be regained if it should be wanted back.
ReplyDelete...give the fear and control over to Him. That's something I'm learning slowly....
Anyway, this blog - especially your first thought - really struck a chord in me. Just thought I'd offer up my 2 cents. :)
Yes. Fear is a huge motivator in my life as well, and I fight it on a daily basis. We are largely manipulated by our fears in areas we wouldn't have ever guessed, or at least, I am. I appreciate your 2 cents :)
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